A Toast to Teamwork

The U.S. Labor Day holiday is a few weeks away and it’s traditionally known as the busiest barbecue day of the year to celebrate with your chums. It’s a time to thank ’em for helping you move you into that new house, painting the fence and feeding the cat. You might have a few friends that you can call up at a moment’s notice for a favor and they’ll be there – just as you’d be for them. Together you make a terrific team and now’s the time to tell them.

That was the case when my wife and I purchased a bargain at the home consignment store – a solid cherry wood dining room table with tasteful inlays and six hand-carved chairs. Loading the pieces into my truck went smoothly, with the assistance of the store’s furniture movers, but when we got home the table proved far too heavy for my wife to help me lift out of the truck and carry into the empty room.

“Regis, I’d like to phone a friend.”

In mere minutes our ladies were chatting, directing and designing while we, the muscle-bound men, dutifully navigated the timber through the front door. Pure teamwork. Our male and female dynamic duos transformed a troublesome task into a fun and victorious adventure. We had to toast our triumph and our friendship.

A couple of weeks later, an informal barbecue spread lay on our new and stately table and we raised our glasses high. The time had come to thank our friends and eat off the fruits of our labor. Here’s the toast I offered for the occasion:

We appreciate your brains and braun,
Twelve hours past the crack of dawn.
Without your muscles to call upon,
We’d be dinning on our front lawn.

The Greek playwright Euripides wrote, “One loyal friend is worth ten thousand relatives.” During our time of need, with no family around, that’s an apt statement.

So, whether you celebrate with steak and beers or wine and cheese, always remember to show gratitude to your comrade in arms. For they are your buddies, your pals – who keep you from harm.

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Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright August 2010 Magical Concepts.

Improve Your Memory

The most powerful and valuable computer in the world is the mind. So why do people fill it with bad information? The brain takes pessimistic input like, “I can’t tell jokes” and processes it literally, making the statement a reality. The dastardly negative, “Don’t forget,” often fails to help the head. To accentuate the positive, simply rephrase – and when you combine it with a rhyme, you will remember every time.

Rhythmic Rhyme
Many of us remember Dr. Seuss because his stories always produce lips that incline after you read the rhythmic rhyme. This is also true when you give a Tasteful Toast – and I’m the bestselling author who’s allowed to cheer and boast. For a grocery list that’s small spot a couple words to recall. Say out loud to yourself, “Milk and bread keep us fed.”

Word games busy the brain and build recall. For decades scientists have proven that people who work on puzzles like jigsaws, crosswords, and Sudoku stimulate brain cell growth, which leads to improved memory.

Another Boat to Float
For those that prefer not to rhyme, there are several other ways to muscle your memory. One option is to make up acronyms to help remember facts, names or sequences. For example, I perform a specific magic trick and need to reveal the aces in order of club, heart, spade and diamond. I use the word CHaSeD. Each consonant is the first letter of the playing card’s suit and that acronym helps me remember.

Learning how to play music challenges the brain and also uses acronyms. “FACE” names the four notes in the spaces of a treble clef scale, but a sentence, “Every Good Boy Deserves Fudge,” is needed to name the five lined notes of E, G, B, D and F. Thinking about a little boy’s face full of fudge provides a vivid image to ignite the memory. Then again, just listening to music can elevate your mood, reduce stress and increase your recollection – and doesn’t involve chocolate or calories.

Rehearse the Verse
My brain tends to remember short little poems or funny, clean limericks. Maybe yours does too. So try one of these techniques, a little at first, and practice a phrase or two. See if your memory begins to improve.

Be an optimist! Positive thinking will keep you clear, focused and alert – affirmative results that science always asserts. Most of all, remember this; Yard by yard, life is hard, but inch by inch, life’s a cinch.

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Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright July 2010 Magical Concepts.

Explain vs. Complain

Communicate clearly and get what you want

People who whine about injustices rarely receive positive results because they are too busy complaining. But if you explain your position and suggest a solution, you’re more likely to get what you want. I’ll illustrate the process with a personal example by using the case of “The Disappearing Tree.”

My wife and I were excited to sponsor a tree to be planted in the Village Pond Park near our new home as part of the city’s “Expand the Forest” program. But a year after our Floss Silk tree was rooted, commemorating our wedding anniversary, I drove by the mini lake and was astonished – our sapling had vanished and was replaced by a metal monolith.

There was no phone call, no letter, no notification of any kind informing us our tree was going to be outsourced. While I was sure the lamp post would improve illumination for evening strollers and our feathered friends’ noturnal activities, I couldn’t help but feel angry, depressed, and jipped. I had to do something.

I wanted to complain. I needed to act upon those strong emotions (it’s only human) and get to the bottom of this foliage fiasco. Who took out our tree and why?

But if I started screaming obcenities at the city’s employees, from the secretary to the manager of the program, I’d only irritate them. They’d shut down and do as little as possible before calling me a whack job and hanging up the phone. And if by some minor miracle I didn’t completely alienate them and they were still willing to help me, they’d ask the all important question: “What do you want?”

I want a replacement tree.

I started my phone call with a succint explanantion of the situation (I paid for a tree and now it’s gone) and my disposition (I’m unhappy) then offered a possible resolution to my problem (I want a new tree). To elicit assistance and get me out of jeopardy, I phrased the last sentence in the form of a question. “Instead of a refund, can you help me determine what happened, and plant a new tree?” I essentially empowered the city employee to flex his authority and set him up as the “good guy.” Everyone wants to be a hero. Here was an opportunity to swoop in to save the day and the environment, too.

He put me on hold to check out my story. When the program manager came back on the line, he confirmed that we had in fact purchased a tree but wanted a maintenance crew to verify my claim of the disappearing tree. He apologized for my inconvenience – a feel-good bonus for me – and promised to call me back within two days with an action plan.

Less than an hour later my phone rang. A member of the city’s landscaping team was at the “Duck Pond” and after a few radio calls, he corroborated my story. The answer was more simple than sinister. There was an existing powerline next to our tree which was ideal for erecting a lakeside lamppost and our timber was to be replaced but the paperwork had been delayed.

My wife and I now have a new magnolia to call our own.

So whether you’re calling in a complaint or writing about your woes, communicate clearly. Summarize the setback, briefly share your feelings on the matter and then offer a mutually beneficial solution. More often than not, you’ll get what you ask for.

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Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright June 2010 Magical Concepts.

American Midol

Faulty feedback causes headaches

Hearing unbridled opinions about your performance can make your head swell with pride or explode with anger. The popular TV reality show American Idol applauds judgemental comments and hard hitting evaluations of contestants singing for stardom. The golden rule of “praise in public and critique in private” has been lost to the television Gods and, unfortunately, millions of viewers are learning by bad examples how to give proper feedback.

Negative Feedback

Melodramic and sarcastic comments may play well on the boob tube and for studio audiences, but making personal attacks leads to tears and potential stalkers. Using nasty words only encourages a “potty mouth” response, which in turn promotes a verbal or physical confrontation. Then everyone will need some Tylenol.

Conversational conflicts hurt feelings and relationships – even when said with the best of intentions.

Constructive Feedback

Candid critiques are very important and can have a positive long term effect when presented with genuine praise.

1. Share something you liked about their performance and mean it.

2. Critique a specific behavoir and breifly tell how it affected you.

3. Suggest a solution describing the outcome you envision by this new action.

Keep criticism concise and treat the person with dignity. Additional discussions seeking clarification “Help me understand; your goal was…” and confirm understanding “So, what you’re saying is…” will successfully complete the feedback circuit.

Giving effective evaluations can be as tricky as removing the childproof cap on an aspirin bottle. But with a little practice and perspective, your critiques will keep them coming back for more.

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Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter, and professional magician. To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright May 2010 Magical Concepts.

Praising in Public

Learn the three Ps of a polished presenter

Most of us, if we’re honest with ourselves, have a little voice inside that wants us to compliment a coworker at a party and say, “You did a great job,” or “I appreciate your help,” but we’re afraid of appearing foolish or saying something embarrassing. That’s normal. Then we watch a seemingly fearless facilitator stand up at the gathering and convey with conviction similar thoughts. We think to ourselves, “I could have said that.” Yes, that’s normal, too. Transform into that polished presenter by following the three Ps: prepare, present, and prevail.

Prepare

To prevent flubbed lines, focus on how your coworker assisted you personally or professionally. Select one instance and summarize the situation, solution, and your satisfaction with the end result.

Pretend you’re in front of the party-goers and say your brief praise out loud. Tell it to your significant other – whether they are two or four legged – this minimal practice will calm most stomach squalls. Silly as it may seem, verbalizing your mini-speech, even to an audience of one will make a huge difference. When my wife’s unavailable then my cat plays second fiddle and listens to me practice (in between her naps and meals).

Present

One of the best times to premiere your praise is right after everyone has assembled and if at a restaurant after folks order their meals. Visualize success and present like you rehearsed.

For example, “My boss needed a chart created for a meeting in ten minutes and I didn’t know how to do it. Bob was able to show me in less than two minutes. I appreciate his help. Thanks, Bob.”

Prevail

A perfect presentation or not, you will be admired for taking a risk and showing genuine gratitude. The next time you give a pat on the back it will become easier. Both you and the recipient will fill with pride.

I recently complimented a co-worker, “Your summary of the project was quite good. You presented a nice high-level overview, touched upon several key points, and concluded with next action steps. I found it very help and informative.” My associate felt good with the recognition and I was delighted with myself for boldly following through with my remark. Reminds me of a quote by the writer and editor Margaret Cousins, "Appreciation can make a day - even change a life. Your willingness to put it into words is all that is necessary."

Far too often people’s achievements are overlooked or worse, expected. A few words of acknowledgement in front of your peers will boost everyone’s moral. Follow the three Ps of a polished presenter (prepare, present, prevail) and you’ll prosper at praising in public.

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Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright April 2010 Magical Concepts.

Webcams: Today’s Techno-Tool

A new generation of online communication

Videoconferencing is not just for large corporations anymore. Small companies use it, sole proprieters use it, and yes, mom and dad use it, too. Whether people pay for a hi-tech interactive telecommunication boardroom or use free software such as Skype, which runs on a home computer, online communication has entered a new era.

Star Trek boldly went wireless in the mid 1960s with handheld communicators, but it was the video-intercom jumbo-tron on the bridge of the Enterprise that ensured a successful mission. Whether you’re presenting a webinar or posting a podcast in real time streaming video, it’s good to remember the three Ps – Posture, Position and Pronunciation – so you, too, can be as victorious as Captain Kirk.

Posture
Onscreen slouching can cause Quasimoto to become green with envy when the camera visually adds “those ten pounds” to your hunched back. To avoid being confused for that famous ringer, do as your parents or drill sergeant ordered: head up, shoulders back and chest out.
Sitting correctly prevents back pain and contributes to a good appearance. Your confidence will grow and people will take you more seriously. Remember: James Tiberius Kirk always sat tall in his captain’s chair.

Position
Camera position is key. Too far away and you’ll look like a midget. Too close and folks will focus on your nose hair. Get it just right – an appropriate mix of upper body and minimal background – and you’ll be admired by millions of cyber-fans and Andorians alike.

Place the webcam about 36 inches from where you’ll sit so the microphone can still acquire your voice. Zoom in and focus on yourself. Verify the screen is filled proportionately and that there’s enough room to show hand gestures, display props, like a book, or complete a demonstration.

Pronunciation
Warm up with the tongue twister and say, “There’s terrible trouble with Tribbles,” three times clearly enunciating each syllable before you turn on your techno-tool and broadcast in broadband. Slight transmission delays and tinny sounds from tiny computer speakers, might squelch your voice. Speak slowly and clearly so you sound intelligent and not like a Klingon ordering zilm'kach!(a small apricot).

Record yourself saying a small speech and then play it back. Close your eyes and listen. After you stop laughing at how different your voice sounds to yourself, play it one more time and pay attention to the pronunciation of the words. Practice until you’re satisfied your peeps will find value in your vocalizations.

Is cyberspace the final frontier? No, but it is a strange new world where full facial features and body language are seen by new generations of family, friends, customers and potential clients. Buckle in the three Ps (posture, position and pronunciation) before you “Engage!” at warp speed.

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Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit http://www.michaelvarma.com/. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright March 2010 Magical Concepts.

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