Four Tests for Taming the Tongue

Count Dracula had a noticible foreign accent and Frankenstein mumbled. Both could have improved their speaking abilities and been less frightening if they had practiced saying a tongue twisters before greeting others. Speaking with proper enunciation, articulation and at a comfortable rate of speed for your presentation style can calm your nerves, improve the quality and clarity of your speech, as well as fully engage your audience.

Tongue twisters are frequently used in speech therapy for adults, foreign language students, and children to help overcome the four main articulation disorders: Substitutions, Omissions, Distortions and Additions – a.k.a. SODA.

Try the following twisters to test and tame your tongue – it’s therapeutic!

The Rules

To get the most out of your tasteful Halloween tongue twisters:

1. Say each tongue twister slowly, pronouncing each word clearly and correctly.

2. Pick two or three tongue twisters per day and repeat slowly three times each.

3. Gradually say the tongue twisters faster, stopping if you trip over words.

Substitutions (R, V and W) – Sounds of a letter replaced for another, like “w” for “r” in “wabbit” for “rabbit.”

· Rabid rabbits ran around the rugged rocks.

· Vernon Vampire visits various vampires virtuously.

· Werewolves watch witches wandering in the woods.

Omissions (B, D and H) – Sounds in a word that are completely omitted, like “han” for “hand.”

· Brad Bat bit bad black bran bread.

· Dracula digs dreary dark dungeons.

· The headless horseman hunts with horrible howling hounds.

Distortions (G, S and TH) - Incorrect sound causing a frontal lisp, as in “sip” for “ship.”

· Giant, green, gross goblins ghoulishly giggle.

· Spiders spin spacious webs in spooky houses.

· He thrusts his fists against the posts and still insists he sees the ghosts.

Additions (F, M and P) - Extra sounds/syllables added to the word, like “animamal” for “animal.”

· Frankfurters fried in fish fat taste fresh and fine to Frankenstein.

· Many mournful mummies moan for their mommies.

· Professional pumpkin pickers are prone to pick the plumpest pumpkins.

Did you tax your tongue until it twisted? Terrific! The next time you tell a tongue-twisting tale, think of Tasteful Toasts.

Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright October 2011 Magical Concepts.

Webcams: Today’s Techno-Tool

A new generation of online communication

Videoconferencing is not just for large corporations anymore. Small companies use it, sole proprieters use it, and yes, mom and dad use it, too. Whether people pay for a hi-tech interactive telecommunication boardroom or use free software such as Skype, which runs on a home computer, online communication has entered a new era.

Star Trek boldly went wireless in the mid 1960s with handheld communicators, but it was the video-intercom jumbo-tron on the bridge of the Enterprise that ensured a successful mission. Whether you’re presenting a webinar or posting a podcast in real time streaming video, it’s good to remember the three Ps – Posture, Position and Pronunciation – so you, too, can be as victorious as Captain Kirk.

Posture
Onscreen slouching can cause Quasimoto to become green with envy when the camera visually adds “those ten pounds” to your hunched back. To avoid being confused for that famous ringer, do as your parents or drill sergeant ordered: head up, shoulders back and chest out.
Sitting correctly prevents back pain and contributes to a good appearance. Your confidence will grow and people will take you more seriously. Remember: James Tiberius Kirk always sat tall in his captain’s chair.

Position
Camera position is key. Too far away and you’ll look like a midget. Too close and folks will focus on your nose hair. Get it just right – an appropriate mix of upper body and minimal background – and you’ll be admired by millions of cyber-fans and Andorians alike.

Place the webcam about 36 inches from where you’ll sit so the microphone can still acquire your voice. Zoom in and focus on yourself. Verify the screen is filled proportionately and that there’s enough room to show hand gestures, display props, like a book, or complete a demonstration.

Pronunciation
Warm up with the tongue twister and say, “There’s terrible trouble with Tribbles,” three times clearly enunciating each syllable before you turn on your techno-tool and broadcast in broadband. Slight transmission delays and tinny sounds from tiny computer speakers, might squelch your voice. Speak slowly and clearly so you sound intelligent and not like a Klingon ordering zilm'kach!(a small apricot).

Record yourself saying a small speech and then play it back. Close your eyes and listen. After you stop laughing at how different your voice sounds to yourself, play it one more time and pay attention to the pronunciation of the words. Practice until you’re satisfied your peeps will find value in your vocalizations.

Is cyberspace the final frontier? No, but it is a strange new world where full facial features and body language are seen by new generations of family, friends, customers and potential clients. Buckle in the three Ps (posture, position and pronunciation) before you “Engage!” at warp speed.

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Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit http://www.michaelvarma.com/. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright March 2010 Magical Concepts.

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Keep Your Credibility

Without losing your cool or your clients

I committed a huge faux pas several months ago and almost lost my credibility as a presenter. My mental TiVo keeps replaying the moments leading up to the mishap until a self-induced coma takes over – a common disease known as “analysis paralysis.” I was the second half of a tag team training session and noticed my teammate was running way too long. When I took the floor, I had less than 15 minutes to cram in 45 minutes of material. But I kept my credibility (and cool) by remembering the three Ps: perspective, patience and politeness.

Perspective
I stood in the back of the room so only the presenter could see me circling my index finger in the, air my universal sign for “wrap it up.” When that didn’t work I tried the basketball referee, hand paddling move for traveling. Nothing. I pointed to my watch then drew my hand across my throat for “cut.” The speaker never acknowledged my presence.

I could have interrupted, played more charades or completed jumping jacks to get his attention, but decided to sit down and look at the situation from a different point of view. While I found his material to be somewhere between uninteresting and downright boring, both in presentation and content, others thought it spot-on. If the audience shared my opinion then I needed to compress my information into a compact, entertaining and powerful message or make it available through another source.

A hybrid solution came to me: I used my meager ten minutes to provide a high-level overview with a few intriguing facts and asked for business cards with email addresses in order to forward additional details. While some ponder if the glass is half full or half empty, my cup overfloweth with more than three-dozen business contacts.

Patience
Our first session of the day was far from perfect and I wanted to share some choice thoughts with my “partner” about his long-winded routine. But several events happened in the span of a few minutes that altered my plans.

First, I reminded myself that the participants are often unaware anything is wrong (unless I tell them or complain about the lack of time), proving ignorance is bliss. Second, my colleague immediately apologized for the lopsided segments before I could unload on him. He even solicited ideas on what could be trimmed from his PowerPoint slide deck. And shocking me to the core he asked, “What was with all the semaphore?”

Had I lost my temper with my associate for being uninformed with basic hand gestures, well, I’d be the backside of a donkey. Had I rushed to the front of the room, sacked the current quarterback and demanded my time, I’d alienate my co-instructor and the childlike actions would crush my credibility with the crowd.

Now for the gratuitous clichés and proverbs to hammer the point a little further:
1. In the end, it all works out
2. Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet
3. One minute of patience, ten years of peace

Politeness
It’s easy to be rude. Even easier to rebuke a presenter for being more focused on their coffee cup than paying attention to the audience or team teacher. But being kind in the shadow of your own frustration is disarming. It brings unforeseen rewards to the surface. As the Dalai Lama said, “Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.”

While my comrade was unfamiliar with the silent messages sent via body language, he responded to a friendly explanation. We completed six more presentations together and debriefed after each session, tweaking, modifying and improving our delivery.

Add up the three Ps (perspective, patience and politeness) and it equals respect. The respect you have for yourself, your audience and fellow presenter, with a calm and polished approach, will keep your credibility.

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Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit http://www.michaelvarma.com/.

Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright August 2009 Magical Concepts.

Resolutions: Worth Their Weight in GOLD

Four steps to fast-track your goals

Resolutions can be daunting, demanding a never-ending change in habits. That’s too much pressure to start the New Year, whereas goals imply a winner at the end of the game. More importantly, goals can begin any month or day of the week. I’ll dust off the classic fable, The Tortoise and the Hare, and show how our green friend fulfills his dream by going for the GOLD – Goals, Objectives, Logistics and Deadlines – to win the race.

Goals
Being successful takes time. It might happen today, next month, or 365 days from now, but defining your vision is step one.

Write down your ultimate goal. Is it to run your first marathon? Offer a tasteful toast at a wedding? Whether it’s a large task like writing a novel or a small chore like cleaning out the junk drawer – get it down on paper. Setting your project on paper begins the process of making it a reality.

If you can imagine it, you can achieve it.
If you can dream it, you can become it.
- William Arthur Ward

Objectives
In the parable, the tortoise dreams of beating the hare in a foot race. An ambitious endeavor? Yes, but listing the objectives and tasks needed to accomplish the ultimate goal brings him closer to the finish line. Our shelled friend’s “to do” list might look like this:

1. Define the distance
2. Train on the track
3. Run the race

Write down the necessary steps to reach your goal. Modify your list as you encounter obstacles (we typically do) and remember what Mom always said, “The journey itself builds character.”

Logistics
When you reach a road block, assess the situation. Look for options and determine if you can go over, around, under or through the barrier. A logistical lifeline is always available. Reach out to an expert or mentor for help.

He who is afraid of asking is ashamed of learning.
- Danish Proverb

Deadlines
Assign a target completion date for each objective. A schedule will emerge and magically propel you down the path toward success. Committing to each deadline will help prevent procrastination.

Had the hare followed through with his original intentions, instead of taking a nap under the oak tree, he’d be showered with champagne in the winner’s circle and not sassing about second place.

There are two mistakes one can make along the road.
Not going all the way and not starting.
- Buddha

Every mile finished in your personal marathon adds momentum, motivating you to “go the distance” – an accomplishment that deserves a victory dance. Winners go for the GOLD (Goals, Objectives, Logistics and Deadlines). Set your path on paper and you’ll be on the fast track to achieving your destiny.

The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

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Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit http://www.michaelvarma.com/.

Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright January 2009 Magical Concepts.

O Christmas Sneeze, O Christmas Sneeze

Are you allergic to the holiday spirit?


Before the last trick-or-treater goes to sleep, retail elves start decking the shopping malls with holiday gifts. When Christmas usurps Halloween it’s easy to feel saturated with holiday cheer and become prematurely filled with the bah-humbugs. By the time Black Friday rolls around the day after Thanksgiving, you’re primed to knock over little old ladies and their walkers to get your loved ones the latest techno-gizmo. Clearly you’re in no shape to shop. Best to apply some mental medicine and fortify your immune system so you’re in the proper frame of mind.

Point of View
As a professional performer, I live the cliché “the show must go on” and know what’s truly vital is to maintain a healthy attitude. Several years ago I was booked to do a magic show at UCLA and made the mistake of having a cup of college coffee. The brew was so strong my hands shook like a workman operating a jackhammer. I could barely shuffle a deck of cards, but my audience didn’t care. They wanted to be entertained. If I were in a movie, it would be the pivotal scene where the hero (that’s me – played by Hugh Jackman) must decide what to do: run away to perform another day or levitate beyond the jolt of java coursing through my body. I chose to reveal my caffeine quandary. Coeds and tenured professors started to laugh with (and at) me all the way through my show. I learned two important lessons: stay away from college coffee and adopt a positive attitude for a positive outcome.

Proper Perspective
Google “positive attitude” and the Internet will return more than 11 million references in less than one second. There are hundreds of articles, quotes, books, essays, games, affirmations and poems devoted to this topic, but all share one basic theme: only you have the power to choose your ’tude.

“Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.”
Winston Churchill

“There are no menial jobs, only menial attitudes.”
William Bennett

“A human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes.”
William James

Rudolph Rage
Going to your “happy place” seems to be more of a challenge especially when faced with long seasonal checkout lines and even longer holiday traffic conditions. How do you release the pressure and return to your jolly jingle?

Breathe.

A well known speaker’s relaxation technique, proven to reduce tension and anxiety, is deep abdominal breathing. Relax your stomach muscles and slowly inhale a deep breath through your nose for five seconds completely filling lungs. Then exhale through the mouth. Most presenters repeat this process three times to get the desired effect – a calm body and clear head in less than 30 seconds.

You can complete this temperance trick in a car, in a bar, or in a line hopefully before you whine. My reference to Dr. Seuss has a point hidden within the rhyme. You can change your attitude anytime.

So while corporate America is out making a few bucks, it’s important to remember that clerks are just doing their jobs, taking your cash, check or charge. And when they say, “Have a nice day,” “Happy Holidays,” or whatever the latest politically correct phrase is, accept it with a smile. Better yet, take a deep breath, get some latitude in your attitude and wish them a Happy New Year!


Until next time,

Michael


Copyright December 2008 Magical Concepts
Contact the author for permission to reprint