More Than Words

Learn the three “A”s that make a magical marriage

It takes more than good communication to create the magical marriages seen in the movies. Wedded bliss is a combination of several movies genres: romance to attain love, comedy to induce laughter, and action to partake in life’s adventures. Read the secret scripts of the three “A”s: Attention, Attitude and Action to celebrate many wedding anniversaries in the future.

Attention

A quote from the screenplay Shakespeare in Love: “The greatest gift you can give another is the purity of your attention.” To pay attention to the large and dreams in your mate’s heart and mind demonstrates a regard like no other. This level of thoughtfulness and understanding can forge a bond to last a lifetime.

Attitude

A winning attitude comes from the movie Good Will Hunting: “It doesn't matter if the guy is perfect or the girl is perfect, as long as they are perfect for each other.” Like two pieces of a jigsaw puzzle, the husband and wife fit together perfectly – each completing the other’s picture. When she, the social butterfly, and he, the event planner, combine their talents they become the cosmic couple.

Action

In When Harry Met Sally viewers heard: “When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.” Such moments are vital to take action. When’s the perfect time to pop the question? Now. And like the characters in that movie, you’ll have your ups and downs and challenges that test the heart, but only when you seize the opportunity will you hear that magic word, “Yes.”

There are no minor roles in your life’s movie. Everyone from your immediate family to your friends and acquaintances plays a significant part; each one pushes you forward on your journey. And if you pay attention, keep a positive attitude, and take immediate action you’ll – you know it’s coming…live happily ever after.

Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright July 2011 Magical Concepts.

Backyard Broadcast

Three tips for wedding toasts at an outdoor venue

Backyard weddings can be intimate and less costly but sometimes come with a legion of logistics. A primary concern is sound. Indoor venues have walls to amplify voices and music giving guests clear sound, but the great outdoors requires microphones and speakers. Take heed of the following tips to ensure the newlyweds and witnesses can hear your well wishes.

Hour of Power

Arrive at least an hour early to test the equipment and acoustics, both frequently overlooked – often due to event day errands (and excuses): You need to pick up black socks for the groom, tissues for the bride, the minister from the airport, or you got stuck in traffic.

I was the officiate and emcee for a couple last July, and by design I arrived two hours early. My time was well spent; about twenty minutes adjusting the microphone volume and rearranging speakers into “the cone zone” (see below) before lending a hand with the decorations to fill in for absent helpers.

The Cone Zone

For outdoor venues speaker placement is critical. You’ll need to take advantage of the speakers’ natural amplification. Be sure that the speaker output, which travels outward like a cone or triangle shape, is faced towards the audience from the corners of the area so that the sound is focused to the center of the seating arena (see picture above).

I relocated the speakers from the floor of the alter to opposite sides of the yard, in lieu of stands, placed them on top of tables because sound travels out and down. An additional benefit to the speaker separation is an unobstructed view of the bride and groom – plus there’s less chance of someone walking in front of the speakers and cause feedback.

Manage the Microphone

Speak into the microphone. It seems a given, but people get excited and start talking with their hands, which can accidentally move the microphone. Then your audience hears every third word – if they’re lucky. Pay attention to the basics and you’ll be you looking and speaking like a pro.

Whether the knot is tied in a courtyard, vineyard or backyard, make sure you know the broadcast basics so that your Tasteful Toasts can be heard.

For more tips and trick about microphones read Acapella Amplified.

Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright June 2011 Magical Concepts.

Happy, Healthy Memories

The day I met Ernie Weckbaugh, he said, “Michael, never turn down an opportunity to speak…especially if you have a captured audience.” That was one of the many lessons I learned from Ernie, which forced a bittersweet smile on my face as I prepared his eulogy last October. Ever the lighthearted teacher, I can hear his voice, “Instead of offering a chronological presentation of my life, provide some basic facts then key insights that evoke happy, healthy memories and maybe an anecdote or two.”

The Facts

Weckbaugh was a veteran journalist, L.A. Daily News columnist, author and former child actor - a member of the original cast of the Our Gang Comedies (Little Rascals) in the 1930s, and my friend. As the owner and president of Casa Graphics, Inc. and Bestseller Books Publishing, he and his wife Patty, of fifty wonderful years, produced several hundred books for self-publishers. He lectured on small business success, marketing and promotion at UCLA, USC and Woodbury colleges.

An Anecdote (or two)

Ernie could not resist three things in life. First and foremost is his lovely wife Patty – and we know she loved him. She changed her perfect alliteration name from Patty Palmer to Patty Weckbaugh. If that doesn’t say, “I love you,” I don’t know what does. Although, being a Weckbaugh does make her unique.

The other two things Ernie could not resist were a good story and a bad pun. For example: Ernie believed in donating blood. It is a healthy altruistic habit – a planned act of kindness is what he called it, which very few people follow through on. One day when he was providing his bi-monthly donation he had an epiphany.

He told the nurse, “There are only two types of blood donors: pessimists and optimists. A pessimist's blood type is always b-negative; and an optimist’s is b-positive.”

That story netted Ernie a chuckle and an extra pack of cookies. I think that was his real goal. He never met a cookie he didn’t like. No doubt the nurses were on to him.

He also loved helping people tell their own stories by self-publishing books. I recall one tale he worked on in the early 1990s. It was about two Eskimos sitting in a kayak and who were chilly, but when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank, which proved once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it, too.

Good clean humor was his trademark. Clean is supreme. Another lesson I learned from Ernest Lewis Weckbaugh.

In Memoriam

I have a simple task for each of you to do on Ernie’s behalf. It’s something very easy. It will take about one hour of your time. And you’ll get a treat when you’re done.

Ernie saved 18 peoples’ lives, a year, for the last 36 years. For non-math majors that’s 630 lives. Like clockwork, every 56 days, Ernie Weckbaugh donated a pint of blood. Each pint can save three lives.

Ernie donated more than 25 gallons of blood over his lifetime and in 2009 was honored by St. Joseph’s Hospital. That’s a whole lot of juice and cookies.

So your mission is, between now and the end of the year, to donate one pint of blood in memory of Ernie Weckbaugh. Maybe, just maybe, it will turn into a happy and healthy habit for you, too.

To Ernie, and Patty, I offer this tasteful toast:

You are unique
Morals sublime
Character rich
One of a kind


Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician.To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright June 2011 Magical Concepts.

Be Warm, Witty and Wise

Learn the three components of a tasteful toast.

As a professional magician and frequent attendee of social gatherings, I believe toasting is one of the easiest ways to turn an ordinary party into an extraordinary celebration. I’ve witnessed how a few spoken words can enhance an evening, enchant guests and promote re-telling of stories about the special event, starting with the toast. You, too, can convey your own magical message by learning the three components of a tasteful toast: Be warm. Be witty. Be wise.

Be Warm

In the popular 1970’s television show Fantasy Island, Mr. Roarke, played by Ricardo Montalbán, warmly greeted his guests in order to set them at ease. He’d say, “Good afternoon everyone, I am Mr. Roarke, your host. Welcome to Fantasy Island.”

We can learn from our history of the mini silver screen. If Mr. Roarke’s simple and genuine introduction worked well for six seasons – 158 episodes – then we can follow the script, too. Address the audience, introduce yourself and provide a sincere welcome.

Be Witty

After the hospitable welcome, people will pause for a few moments to listen for more information. For example, “Dinner is served in the main room. Please take your seats.” In my experience, this is an excellent time to proffer a brief humorous observation.

Below are a few generic funnies:

• All our guests make us happy; some by coming and others by going.

• Home: the place where you’re treated the best and grumble the most.

• Never eat more than you can lift.

Be Wise

Next comes sage advice. What to say will vary depending on the wisdom to impart on the occasion: birthday, wedding, divorce (yes, that’s true!), baby shower, new job, or promotion. Quotes, proverbs, Tasteful Toasts, or writing words from the heart offers a vast array of appropriate remarks.

• Baby: To the new parents, who are about to enter a “changing” world!

• Promotion: May the work that you have be the play that you love.

• Divorce: Always remember that hindsight is the best insight to foresight.

Put it all together and you’ll have three sentences – one warm, one witty and one wise:

“Good evening ladies and gentlemen, my name is Michael Varma and I am your emcee for the evening. Welcome to Captain Sunny’s retirement party. He’s a man who knows everything and now has plenty of time to tell you all about it. Sunny, remember it’s not the years in your life, but the life in your years.”

Practice your lines a couple of times to ensure a steady delivery, then let the festivities begin!

M

ichael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright April 2011 Magical Concepts.

No Reward: Priceless

Rewards and incentives drive good behaviors, and increase quality and productivity, but frequently no reward is the best reward a person can receive. The other day I was the recipient of that rare, priceless gift and I’m compelled to share my story.

Finders Keepers

While driving to the library to return a book, I came to a stop at a busy intersection and noticed a walking stick lying in the middle of road. The cane’s shiny brass handle seemed to wink

at me. Yes, this falls into the category of corny, but true. I did not hesitate. I put my vehicle in park and before a steady stream of cars could run me down, I retrieved the discarded dowel.

Upon returning home I began my examination. It was a work of art. The wooden shaft had a spiral inlay of twenty-one brass four-leaf clovers with a complementary solid brass duck’s head handle. Affixed to the collar were a military insignia and an American flag. It had a tasteful masculine air to it. My inspection was interrupted by a phone call, which started another series of events: a funeral, a wedding, and a flurry of houseguests.

Sympathetic Seekers

I placed the prized staff in my home office with the best intentions of promptly finding the owner. During my trips to the airport to pick up and drop off family members, I pondered how to reunite the separated parties.

Sherlock Holmes or Nero Wolf would place an advert in the evening gazette and within a few days suitors would inquire, but this is high-tech modern day where print media is waning. Should I post a picture on Craig’s List? Facebook? Or maybe a low-tech solution of a “Found Cane” flier on telephone poles would be better. More pondering.

Several days went by and on Sunday morning I rolled out of bed and was determined to find cane’s owner. While still in my pajamas I scrutinized the cane for any further clues and that’s when I saw it. Under the handle was a small white label with a name and address. How did I miss that before? My guilt was reduced, just a tad, remembering the adventurous week I had from dawn to dusk and beyond.

Thankful Peepers

I readied myself for my mission with a quick shower, dressed, ate breakfast and hopped into the truck with MapQuest directions in hand. Exactly one mile away (it turned out) I reached my destination.

A spry senior gentleman came to the door, “Yes, may I help you?” he said. I held up the walking stick and his eyes grew wide with surprise and salvation. “I thought I lost that forever. Thank you.” he exclaimed. “I remember putting my wife’s walker in the car to go to the hospital but when we got to the emergency room my cane was gone.”

Priceless.

There are more than monetary rewards in life, which he did offer and I insistently declined. To receive a heartfelt “thank you” is payment beyond measure. This brings to mind an Aristotle quote: “In the arena of human life, the honors and rewards fall to those who show their good qualities in action.”

Why wait to return a lost possession to lift your spirits? Every day we have the privilege to offer genuine praise for a job well done or a sincere compliment to a co-worker, family member or best friend. Do it today. Give something for nothing and reap the rewards.

A tasteful toast to a planned act of kindness:

May it always be in fashion

To arise and take swift action

When a deed is to be done

Even where reward is none

Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright March 2011 Magical Concepts.

Learn to be Lucky

Follow the three Vs to your pot of gold

Some people seem to have all the luck. They not only avoid the pink-slip parade at work, they receive a promotion with a healthy increase in pay, to boot. Do they have a four-leaf clover hidden in their front pocket? No. These savvy folks have a simple secret. They generate luck by applying the three Vs: vision, valor and vigor.

Vision

Every prosperous person will cite a driving force: a vision. The ultimate dream, a heart’s desire or personal pot of gold can only be achieved once a goal has been established. Wanting to retire by the age of 42, becoming a published author or lecturing around the country commanding a five-figure fee are prime examples.

“People with goals succeed because they know where they’re going.” ~ Earl Nightingale

Motivated individuals tend to have more than one ambition and each is clearly defined. A mental, and sometimes physical, outline starts them on their journey.

Valor

The next step in realizing a vision requires an act of bravery – to move forward and have the courage to divide that big dream into smaller, manageable actionable work assignments.

“I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have.” ~ Thomas Jefferson

You can – and should – ask for help with this chunking strategy. Often you will discover one or more subject matter experts – how lucky is that? – who may guide you through seemingly impossible tasks.

Vigor

As you encounter insurmountable obstacles – and you will because that’s the reality of life – remain calm, be brave, and continue to ask for help along the way. True “luck” occurs when you recognize opportunities and take advantage of incoming phone calls and emails, visiting family and friends, and other helpful messengers of luck.

"Successful people keep moving." ~ Conrad Hilton

Celebrate the many minor matters you resolve and each major milestone you achieve. Every victory fosters self-confidence and strengthens your resolve, driving you to complete your original vision.

Consider the Arab proverb: Throw a lucky man into the sea and he will come up with a fish. Is he truly lucky or did he assess his dire situation and act boldly in order to survive being tossed into the ocean?

Luck frequently accompanies the men and women employing the three V’s. Whether it’s an original vision or the sighting of a golden opportunity, have the valor and vigor to pursue the prospect and find your pot of gold.

A tasteful toast to your good fortune:

May your pockets be heavy

And your heart be light

May good luck pursue you

Every morning, noon and night

Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright February 2011 Magical Concepts.