Be Warm, Witty and Wise

Learn the three components of a tasteful toast.

As a professional magician and frequent attendee of social gatherings, I believe toasting is one of the easiest ways to turn an ordinary party into an extraordinary celebration. I’ve witnessed how a few spoken words can enhance an evening, enchant guests and promote re-telling of stories about the special event, starting with the toast. You, too, can convey your own magical message by learning the three components of a tasteful toast: Be warm. Be witty. Be wise.

Be Warm

In the popular 1970’s television show Fantasy Island, Mr. Roarke, played by Ricardo Montalbán, warmly greeted his guests in order to set them at ease. He’d say, “Good afternoon everyone, I am Mr. Roarke, your host. Welcome to Fantasy Island.”

We can learn from our history of the mini silver screen. If Mr. Roarke’s simple and genuine introduction worked well for six seasons – 158 episodes – then we can follow the script, too. Address the audience, introduce yourself and provide a sincere welcome.

Be Witty

After the hospitable welcome, people will pause for a few moments to listen for more information. For example, “Dinner is served in the main room. Please take your seats.” In my experience, this is an excellent time to proffer a brief humorous observation.

Below are a few generic funnies:

• All our guests make us happy; some by coming and others by going.

• Home: the place where you’re treated the best and grumble the most.

• Never eat more than you can lift.

Be Wise

Next comes sage advice. What to say will vary depending on the wisdom to impart on the occasion: birthday, wedding, divorce (yes, that’s true!), baby shower, new job, or promotion. Quotes, proverbs, Tasteful Toasts, or writing words from the heart offers a vast array of appropriate remarks.

• Baby: To the new parents, who are about to enter a “changing” world!

• Promotion: May the work that you have be the play that you love.

• Divorce: Always remember that hindsight is the best insight to foresight.

Put it all together and you’ll have three sentences – one warm, one witty and one wise:

“Good evening ladies and gentlemen, my name is Michael Varma and I am your emcee for the evening. Welcome to Captain Sunny’s retirement party. He’s a man who knows everything and now has plenty of time to tell you all about it. Sunny, remember it’s not the years in your life, but the life in your years.”

Practice your lines a couple of times to ensure a steady delivery, then let the festivities begin!

M

ichael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright April 2011 Magical Concepts.

No Reward: Priceless

Rewards and incentives drive good behaviors, and increase quality and productivity, but frequently no reward is the best reward a person can receive. The other day I was the recipient of that rare, priceless gift and I’m compelled to share my story.

Finders Keepers

While driving to the library to return a book, I came to a stop at a busy intersection and noticed a walking stick lying in the middle of road. The cane’s shiny brass handle seemed to wink

at me. Yes, this falls into the category of corny, but true. I did not hesitate. I put my vehicle in park and before a steady stream of cars could run me down, I retrieved the discarded dowel.

Upon returning home I began my examination. It was a work of art. The wooden shaft had a spiral inlay of twenty-one brass four-leaf clovers with a complementary solid brass duck’s head handle. Affixed to the collar were a military insignia and an American flag. It had a tasteful masculine air to it. My inspection was interrupted by a phone call, which started another series of events: a funeral, a wedding, and a flurry of houseguests.

Sympathetic Seekers

I placed the prized staff in my home office with the best intentions of promptly finding the owner. During my trips to the airport to pick up and drop off family members, I pondered how to reunite the separated parties.

Sherlock Holmes or Nero Wolf would place an advert in the evening gazette and within a few days suitors would inquire, but this is high-tech modern day where print media is waning. Should I post a picture on Craig’s List? Facebook? Or maybe a low-tech solution of a “Found Cane” flier on telephone poles would be better. More pondering.

Several days went by and on Sunday morning I rolled out of bed and was determined to find cane’s owner. While still in my pajamas I scrutinized the cane for any further clues and that’s when I saw it. Under the handle was a small white label with a name and address. How did I miss that before? My guilt was reduced, just a tad, remembering the adventurous week I had from dawn to dusk and beyond.

Thankful Peepers

I readied myself for my mission with a quick shower, dressed, ate breakfast and hopped into the truck with MapQuest directions in hand. Exactly one mile away (it turned out) I reached my destination.

A spry senior gentleman came to the door, “Yes, may I help you?” he said. I held up the walking stick and his eyes grew wide with surprise and salvation. “I thought I lost that forever. Thank you.” he exclaimed. “I remember putting my wife’s walker in the car to go to the hospital but when we got to the emergency room my cane was gone.”

Priceless.

There are more than monetary rewards in life, which he did offer and I insistently declined. To receive a heartfelt “thank you” is payment beyond measure. This brings to mind an Aristotle quote: “In the arena of human life, the honors and rewards fall to those who show their good qualities in action.”

Why wait to return a lost possession to lift your spirits? Every day we have the privilege to offer genuine praise for a job well done or a sincere compliment to a co-worker, family member or best friend. Do it today. Give something for nothing and reap the rewards.

A tasteful toast to a planned act of kindness:

May it always be in fashion

To arise and take swift action

When a deed is to be done

Even where reward is none

Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright March 2011 Magical Concepts.

Learn to be Lucky

Follow the three Vs to your pot of gold

Some people seem to have all the luck. They not only avoid the pink-slip parade at work, they receive a promotion with a healthy increase in pay, to boot. Do they have a four-leaf clover hidden in their front pocket? No. These savvy folks have a simple secret. They generate luck by applying the three Vs: vision, valor and vigor.

Vision

Every prosperous person will cite a driving force: a vision. The ultimate dream, a heart’s desire or personal pot of gold can only be achieved once a goal has been established. Wanting to retire by the age of 42, becoming a published author or lecturing around the country commanding a five-figure fee are prime examples.

“People with goals succeed because they know where they’re going.” ~ Earl Nightingale

Motivated individuals tend to have more than one ambition and each is clearly defined. A mental, and sometimes physical, outline starts them on their journey.

Valor

The next step in realizing a vision requires an act of bravery – to move forward and have the courage to divide that big dream into smaller, manageable actionable work assignments.

“I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have.” ~ Thomas Jefferson

You can – and should – ask for help with this chunking strategy. Often you will discover one or more subject matter experts – how lucky is that? – who may guide you through seemingly impossible tasks.

Vigor

As you encounter insurmountable obstacles – and you will because that’s the reality of life – remain calm, be brave, and continue to ask for help along the way. True “luck” occurs when you recognize opportunities and take advantage of incoming phone calls and emails, visiting family and friends, and other helpful messengers of luck.

"Successful people keep moving." ~ Conrad Hilton

Celebrate the many minor matters you resolve and each major milestone you achieve. Every victory fosters self-confidence and strengthens your resolve, driving you to complete your original vision.

Consider the Arab proverb: Throw a lucky man into the sea and he will come up with a fish. Is he truly lucky or did he assess his dire situation and act boldly in order to survive being tossed into the ocean?

Luck frequently accompanies the men and women employing the three V’s. Whether it’s an original vision or the sighting of a golden opportunity, have the valor and vigor to pursue the prospect and find your pot of gold.

A tasteful toast to your good fortune:

May your pockets be heavy

And your heart be light

May good luck pursue you

Every morning, noon and night

Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright February 2011 Magical Concepts.

Verses for Valentine's Day

Toasts for your true love

Step away from the chocolates and drive past the corner flower vendor, and that lingerie store, too. Your better half doesn’t really want these material things. Their true secret desire is to be a rock star with you, the number one fan, prepared to shower them with attention. The U.S. Post Office delivered more than one billion Valentine's Day cards last year proving that modern-day Romeos and Juliets want words of affection to make their cups runneth over.

Why Words?
Cupid’s candies might bring both of you short-term satisfaction, but such sugary love can sabotage the long-term New Year’s resolutions to lose those holiday pounds. Best to avoid the guilt and regret. Some folks believe that traditional red roses have a down side, too. The ever-increasing expense for flowers that wither within a week isn’t worth the investment. Frequently the good deed is forgotten well before you down your first St. Patrick’s Day beer.

But an original verse to your true love on Valentine’s Day etches a memory in the heart and on the mind. Most people have learned from our tough economy what really matters is your partner – the person by your side who supports you and your dreams. Now is the time to say so.

For Him
A man wants to brag about how his sweetheart treated him on this special day. He might delight in a homemade pancake breakfast or a romantic dinner for two, but he’ll also enjoy a surprise voicemail message before his morning coffee.

There are a myriad of ways,
That you compliment my days.
I adore each one,
With ever more fun,
Our life of endless holidays.

For Her
A woman longs for a tale to tell her girlfriends, for years to come, of how her man spoke sweet words that stirred her soul. So, write or recite a romantic phrase and share with your cutie-pie how she enchants you.

Did you know my heart skips a beat?
For you are my heavenly treat.
I’ll say today and I’ll repeat,
You make my life true and complete.

---

Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright January 2011 Magical Concepts.

Santa’s Secrets Revealed

Learn how the big guy gets it all done

Before putting on the magical red suit, Santa makes his list and checks it twice. Then, and only then, does the jolly old man race around the globe delivering presents. Modern day shippers like UPS and FedEx follow Santa’s lead and print manifests before deploying the motor pool. A source from the North Pole leaked the big guy’s secret formula of using the goal-setting acronym SMART: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Timely.

Specific

Even if you don’t believe in Santa, you can refer to the dozens of research studies, published from the 1960s to current day that prove productivity increases when people give themselves specific goals. Saying, “I’ve got to purchase some presents,” is too general and probably won’t produce the desired result. Instead, state, “I want to buy gifts for Barbara, Missy, Pam, and Steve.” Your mind will identify appropriate goodies for each person on your list.

Measurable

Define a start and finish line in order to measure your progress and celebrate each accomplishment along the way. In my example, I have four family members on my gift-giving list. After finding and paying for Barbara and Missy’s surprises I’ll be halfway done – so near to completion, my motivation will drive me until I reach 100 percent.

Attainable

If you had millions of naughty and nice kids’ names to review by hand, it would be an insurmountable task. Many people tend to give up if a task seems impossible to reach – sometimes before the first attempt. Establish an attainable goal and vastly increase your chances of success.

Realistic

Dreaming big is excellent advice especially when it is paired with rational and tangible goals. Attempting to be the earth’s next Santa Claus is grandiose, but wanting to be a local philanthropist is more realistic. Clearly visualize what you want and share the desires with your family and friends. This will generate additional excitement and propel you forward.

Timely

To deliver a lump of coal or new toy to every deserving boy and girl within 10 to 12 hours can put on a little pressure on Mr. Claus, although deadlines do provide urgency. A little stress is good to help focus our intentions and energies toward completing a task and receiving a reward, financial incentive or a sincere “thank you” when your loved one tears open the present from underneath the Christmas tree.

Whether you believe in his Christmas Jelly-Belly-ness or not, you can admire and learn from his top-notch organizational skills. Keep your goals SMART – Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Timely. High achievers know precisely what they want, because they’ve written it down in simple, clear terms to keep them focused.

Write down your list of goals (and check it twice) to increase your chance of success. Make your SMART list today!

Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright December 2010 Magical Concepts.

Exercise Your Rights

Achieving balance during the holidays

Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s Eve! Oh my! How did Dorothy keep her girlish figure during the holidays? Jazzercise! She and her gaggle of friends danced down the yellow brick road to the hip tunes of the day. Well, that and she didn’t have multiple family gatherings and office parties with tempting high calorie treats to increase her waistline. But if Dorothy and her merry band did participate in the year-end food-o-rama, they’d provide the following tips for enjoying the holiday season without gaining weight.

Exercise

“We've been walking a long ways.” ~ Dorothy Gale

The trek to the Emerald City was accomplished by walking every single day. And research from the National Health Services shows that walking 10,000 steps a day will significantly improve your health. Whether you walk, jog, bicycle or swim, daily physical activity will relieve stress and burn up extra calories and can balance out some holiday meals.

Friends

“My, my goodness -- I can talk again!” ~ Tin Woodsman

Although food can be a big part of the season, it doesn’t have to be the focus. Holidays are a wonderful time to reunite with your buddies, share stories and give thanks. Friends have (healthy) benefits, so take advantage of the gathering to speak from the heart and offer a tasteful toast to your friends:

You are unique, morals sublime.
Character rich, one of a kind.

Maintenance

“Ain't it the truth!” ~ Cowardly Lion

A realistic goal is weight maintenance versus weight loss during the holidays. Make reasonable food choices and you’ll succeed – the foundation of the Weight Watchers food plan. If you’re still worried about the tempting treats, avoid arriving famished at the celebration. Have the courage to eat a light meal before leaving the house – a cup of soup or cheese and crackers on the stomach can help you resist sampling everything at a potluck party.

Sensible

“Oh, joy, rapture! I've got a brain!” ~ Scarecrow

It’s okay to eat. Remember moderation. And there are plenty of low fat and low calorie recipes posted online that are truly tasty. Try using applesauce in place of oil in your favorite holiday breads or make pumpkin brownies, which are yummy and contain fiber – a helpful tip from Hungry-Girl.com.

To find the Wizard of Oz and achieve their heart’s desire, Dorothy and her friends possessed the necessary resources: brains, heart and courage. You, too, can use your brain to avoid known personal food triggers, talk from your heart to reconnect with your friends and have the courage to exercise in order to enjoy the holiday season without gaining weight.

Michael Varma is a freelance writer, award-winning presenter and professional magician. To learn more, visit www.MichaelVarma.com. Contact Michael Varma, the author of Tasteful Toasts, for permission to reprint this article. Copyright November 2010 Magical Concepts.